Freedom


I keep my heart close by my side
These days though it has often tried
To steal itself away
It tells me that it’s not content
With all the years I’ve kept it pent
It wants to go and play
But these days I am not prepared
To find it needs to be repaired
Like it has done before
I know it can’t keep up the pace
So it will have to learn its place
I won’t love anymore

My eyes at least are free to look
Their world is like an open book
It’s pages coloured bright
I trust them to see all they see
And always to return to me
Not blinded by the light
Their freedom is not charity
Instead it is the clarity
With which I see my way
And thus I see but don’t possess
And so I measure my success
In keeping love at bay

My arms have nothing more to do
Than hold my memories of you
And keep them in their place
They reach towards a warmer land
A place I used to love to stand
It’s sun upon my face
Painfully I’ve had to learn
I cannot bear one more sunburn
My skin remains too raw
My arms will hold the world away
And I will live another day
I won’t love anymore

My legs may run the day to ground
Pursuing every joyful sound
To hunt down and to kill
I move with undiminished ease
At any moment set to freeze
If everything’s too still
I look for pleasure but I keep
Aware of silence that’s too deep
I do not want to drown
But if I run I run away
I don’t now have the strength for play
My heart’s gone too far down

And all of me must bear the strain
Must hold the line and not complain
Because this has to be
The discipline is all too real
To leave me room for how I feel
I have to think of me
And if you say this makes me cold
Then I reply I’m getting old
And this way I can live
I can’t be free to break again
The hurt’s too much to be sustained
I will hold on to what I’ve gained
I have no more to give

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