It can hardly have escaped people’s notice that our traditionally fair country has this week been playing host to a Mr and Mrs Obama, of Washington DC, in the United States of That Horrible Mistake (had I been Dictator at the appropriate time, I would never have allowed those poor people to try to make it on their own without proper and enlightened Government).
Needless to say, the press of this land has afforded this young couple some free publicity, to which they appear to have responded with a welcome degree of dignity and charm to an exposure to which they can hardly be expected to be familiar (that is, when our most determined investigative journalists have not been pursuing the endeavours of young ladies from Northumbria attempting to earn an honest penny in the Obama’s homeland).
I have found the warm and supportive approach of the Daily Mail to be enlightening, with their daily portrayal of the innocent and naive Mrs Obama – a charming young lady by all accounts – on the cover of their publication, contrasting Mrs Obama’s couture with that of a seemingly better dressed white lady in a cheap frock, and dubbing Mrs Obama ‘The Princess of Bling’ – some perhaps obscure reference to the contrast between her silver necklace and her dark skin.
Indeed, the paper should be applauding Mrs Obama’s startling originality in wearing jewellery around her neck, a fashion innovation that may well catch on amongst the more daring and forward white ladies.
When I am Dictator I shall encourage this open-hearted approach to the fair sex from this most adventurous of newspapers. Mr Dacre will be rewarded by leisure from his labours in quarters of my own commissioning, secure in the knowledge that his work will be carried on by subsidiaries well-versed in his efforts: Miss Campbell, Miss Bindel and Miss Bidisha.
The circulation will no doubt treble.